Spoiled Prince

Never knew love was until I met you,
Never expected changes in my life,
Never thought that you were still in my heart.

I kept thinking of you..
everyday and every moment.
I've been spending time to thinking of happy moments we had.
And keep pretending the truth that we're totally far from each other.
I've been in a battle between my mind and my heart..
my mind about to give up,
but my heart saying cheer up.
Which I should support? My heart or my mind?
Thats no answer from myself, I cant do anything else..

You were much different from those girls that I even known,
I loves your attitude,
It is in you where I felt the true love.
If ever that I could put back time,
The time where in we were still together sharing great moments.
I could vanish all of my sad/hate memories,
And could fulfill all of my happy/sweet memories in my mind if you were still at my side but
unfortunately I cant..

I don't know if I do really need to say goodbye..
but still far,
i am confuse,
i am drowning of thoughts on how used to be.
I am still walking under the crying sky and leave a bath of tears on me on how hurtfulness am i while whispered myself..

"I thought you were just playing and same goes to me..
but you were very very serious in our relationship.. I did so..
but I dint prepared yet..
I never learn what i can do if you're my first love..
How come I'm still treat you as my little sis just like last time..
It's hard for me to become your prince..
I hate myself and freaking hate myself.. "
..Somehow this heart of mine would learn to accept reality and be contented...
..contented to be just missing you..

I don't have any guts to get along with somebody else and pretend to be happy though I'm not.
I thought i already have you since before and will with you forever.
I still have lots of things to know about you..
but love can't be forced..
maybe its too late..
Again, I'm fail as a prince.. - spoiled prince